Reflections on the anniversary of becoming a mother...

Today is my son's first birthday and all I'm really thinking about is Judah.  I keep thinking about how blessed we are and how thankful I am to have a wonderful baby and husband.  I am thinking about what I was doing at this time 365 days ago...

Has it really been a year?  

I am such a different person than I was then.  Or really, maybe I just perceive myself differently now.  I have realized I am capable of much more love and patience than I ever thought I was.  At times, I remember being afraid to be a mom.  I thought I would only ever be able to handle 2 children until I had Judah.  He's made me realize how great a gift children are and that the Lord's grace sustains me.

Judah's life has helped me see how much God loves me.  How much He gives to me over and over.  There are times when Judah misbehaves and I have to get stern with him and then not two seconds later I scoop him up in my arms and kiss him all over. I don't even remember what it is that frustrated me just before that sweet moment. That's the kind of love Jesus has for me.  I get that more now.

I understand the yearning God must have for me.  How He sits and waits to talk to me all day long (and does many days) if He has to. How He forgives me completely with each mistake. I understand the love that never leaves, not fully, but I have a greater picture now.

I am so very blessed to have had 365 days to catch more of a glimpse of the infinite love God has for His children. My days are not perfect, but His blessings are.  Through Judah, I have learned so much and my heart has been filled to a greater capacity than I ever thought possible.

Happy Birthday, Judah!  You are God's blessings in the flesh.

Judah's 1st Birthday Party: Brainstorming

Judah's first birthday will be in a just under 2 months and in order to keep my life simple and have plenty of time to create the party I'm envisioning, I'm starting the planning process early.  I've come up with a theme and have gathered mucho inspiration a la world wide web:

Vintage Carnival

Snippet and Ink made this mood board and did a fabulous job. The vibe it gives off is exactly what I'm going for- sans the fresh flowers and feminine touches.  I plan on bringing in masculine elements... it is my son's birthday after all:)  I'm pulling my colors directly from this, focusing on light blue, teal green, golden yellow and an orange-red.

As seen on Birthday Girl and photographed by The Winding Road

The outfit on the little boy in this photo is priceless.  I'm looking for a cute striped shirt for Jude to wear and want to give him a sort of "ringmaster" look. I love the pennants hanging from the ceiling and am hoping to have some adorning the dining room.

In order to save money, I plan on designing the invitations myself.  I was inspired by these gorgeous vintage invites done by Bier Designs.  I already have a design done but am not sure I am liking them that much.  Oh the woes of a designer.  ;)

Mustaches found at Carnival Creations

I plan on making some mustaches on a stick out of black construction paper and have a fun idea planned for them... you'll have to wait and see what it is.

There are so many ideas I could try to incorporate but I want the planning process to be enjoyable and not stressful.  In the end, I may hire out a few things I would normally attempt to DIY myself and I may nix a few ideas I originally had.  I want this to be a celebration of my baby to bring fun and joy to our lives; not take away from this special time because I get too caught up in the details.  Pray for me;)

As I type this, Jude is sitting on the floor playing adorable with his toys and books.  Life is so good right now.

So what do you think, do you have any ideas for me?  Do you like planning parties as much as I do?