letters

over the past few weeks, brandon and i have spent some time reliving our past. as mentioned before on this blog (specifically this post), brandon honored our country by serving four years in the Marine Corp. while dating, our relationship was tested over and over again, as we struggled with the distance and the reality of being separated by miles, oceans and wars.

brandon's first tour in iraq was in 2003 and our only means of communication was writing letters. we were old school:) there were no phones, no internet and no way of knowing where he was. or if he was okay. or even alive. looking back, i have no idea how i kept it together. i spent a lot of time with God during those months he was away and i truly believe that He gave me a peace that surpassed all understanding. brandon's mom, jenny, felt the same way. she said that she never once doubted that he wouldn't come home. we all rallied together and prayed and prayed and prayed and we are all thankful that God's plan was for brandon to come home safe. that prayer is a powerful tool:)

now that we have our own home, we have a little more space (and stability...no more moving!) to collect some items from our past. brandon had been keeping all things marine corp related in his mom's basement until this past weekend when she graciously handed them over (while silently thanking God for her basement back:)). there was a lot of nostalgia in the air as we looked through old uniforms, worn combat boots and pile after pile of training manuals. and last but not least, the letters. letters that still had remnants of dusty, dessert sand and smelled of musty, old library books. there was a pile of "family" letters and there was a pile of "maggie" letters. looking back at them brings back a lot of different feelings, but mostly an overwhelming feeling of thankfulness. thankful for keeping him safe, for sparing his life, for giving me peace.....so many feelings of thanks.

little by little, we are reading through them together. and boy is it an emotional roller coaster:) not many relationships live to see the end of a war, much less a marriage, so we have been feeling very blessed.

all letters were kept safe in this handy MRE bag

the "maggie" letters

a couple excerpts:

february 5, 2003
"....brandon, i need you to come home. i really, really need you to come home. so please don't break your promise to me and come back. i know it's all in the hands of God, and at times like these, i wish i could see into the future. but, unfortunately, i can't. i love you, think about me a lot, and most importantly, talk to God."

february 6, 2003 
"....never forget my love for you, brandon. someday we'll look back at all these letters and laugh. actually, i'll probably cry:) my love is flying to you on angel's wings....keep praying...."


february 11, 2003
".....i am so incredibly proud of you. and i'm not just saying that because you're gone and i'm your girlfriend. when i really think about what you're over there doing, i feel so lucky and proud to say that you are my boyfriend. i can honestly say that you are my hero. i love you.....be careful and come home to me soon...."


" For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

honor, courage and commitment

one area of my life that i feel could reach others is that fact that i am a military wife! well, not technically...more like a military girlfriend-turned-wife..but who's counting? my husband is no longer active or overseas, but once a Marine, always a Marine...am i right?

i can relate to those thousands and thousands of wives out there, who have no idea when or IF they will ever see their man again. they keep their cell phone glued to their hand at all times of the day and night, anxiously waiting for a call that typically only lasts a few minutes, but gives them the strength to keep functioning the rest of the week. and then, being reunited after a year, they remain strong, continuing to pick up the pieces of a man that may look the same, but has seen and heard and experienced an incredible amount of pain. something inside of him is different. he flinches at certain noises. he has a hard time with war scenes. his dreams are filled with images of war, that he has to re-live every night as he sleeps. he is forever changed. those wives will never fully understand, but they are left with the most important jobs. listening. loving. supporting.

i can relate to those wives...i am one of those wives.

while much of this blog will be about daily life news, (kids, homes, friendships..) sometimes my life involves post traumatic stress disorder, shrapnel wounds or unhealthy ways of dealing with stress. thankfully, brandon and i have a wonderful support system with our friends and family, and ultimately rely on God with any struggles we come across. my hope for this blog is that i could speak to many women who may find themselves in similar circumstances.

and can i just say what an honor it is to boast that MY husband fought for our freedom? i am proud to say that he's mine...war wounds and all:)

hope this post wasn't too much of a downer, but more like a peek into my life.
thanks for listening...